 A couple of days ago when I was walking my dogs early in the morning, something from the yard of a house started to make loud noise. It was probably a compressor for sprinklers or something. Well, Button was startled and became anxious and asked me for help. My internal voice was saying, "Button, it's nothing dangerous. You don't have to be afraid of it. You are completely safe" and I immediately started to wonder how I could show him it's actually safe and let him realize that himself. If you watch Dog Whisperer, you know the worst thing you could do is to baby him, pick him up and comfort him. Such actions will only nurture the dog's anxious state of mind (and too many "dog lovers" do it). Luckily, Button came out of his mini panic quickly when I ignored him and kept moving. Then, I realized - I ignored him because I loved him. Although I didn't have time to come up with a well-thought strategy, I knew I wouldn't nurture his anxiety. As I kept walking, I started to wonder - what if this is what the Universe does too for us. I wanted him to really know he's totally safe and I knew he was. I chose what I thought was the most effective way to achieve that goal, which is love-based instead of my emotional desire to feel needed by a cute little creature. That's right; if God loves us (or in New Age jargon, if the Universe operates solely with loving energy), He wouldn't just save us from every bump in the road. I started to play with that theory and came up with another piece of supporting idea. When Cesar Millan rehabilitates a fearful dog, he actually sets up an environment in which the dog encounters what she's scared of--not just once but numerous times. It could be skateboarders, other dogs, etc. He does that exactly because the dog will quickly and effectively learn those obstacles are not there to harm her. But for the dog, this must be a sequence of freak accidents. If she could speak, she might say, "Why? Why is this happening to me? Why am I getting the same problem again and again! How come He doens't save me when I'm so scared? Will this ever end?" So, perhaps this is also why we encounter the same life problems or the same kind of dysfunctional relationships again and again. Perhaps the Universe is doing us a favor so we can heal really quickly. Perhaps we are not really getting new trauma from the repeated "tragedies" we sometimes encounter in our lives. Perhaps someday, we suddenly realize what we are doing and the "exercise" will suddenly end too. Perhaps this is why "letting go" is supposed to be a major life lesson. Perhaps tomorrow you could try to do what you've been always afraid of doing. Perhaps you could pick something small first and see what you find out. |